So I'm (32 M) in a position that I know what I have to change to keep women in long term relationships but I don't care to change myself

2021.11.29 14:50 thereal2fac3 So I'm (32 M) in a position that I know what I have to change to keep women in long term relationships but I don't care to change myself

I'll keep this as short as I can.
So, I lost my virginity when I was 15 but didn't get an actual girlfriend until I was 17. I got engaged to a different girl I had a thing for since middle school but we lost contact due to going to different highschools and reunited in our early 20s. My last relationship ended last June and I stopped talking to her since last October due to drama. I have been in 8 relationships total, and that's not to count the flings or intimate interactions I've had with various women.
My thing is, at my core I'm a good guy. I don't want mistreat women, want to co-exist long term with someone, and just want to be drama free. I understand that arguments happen and the sunny days turn to rainy days from time to time, but I'm okay with that because it's natural.
I don't know how to word this but I'll start with how I treated relationships from 17 til at the end of my engagement (22.) I was too friendly. I stood up for myself but I used to baby who I was with. I would always try to make sure they're good, get along with their family/friends, and just try not to cause any issues. I would pay for dates/outings with no question, and I often times put them over myself out of hopes it would be returned but ultimately it wasn't. Yes, I got cheated on in pretty much all of my relationships in this time period, and I wouldn't understand why since it would always be while I was at work or something. But whatever.
After that, I had a pretty big social media following on FB just locally (about 4000 people) since I wrote poetry all the time and posted it. There would be a lot of females hitting me asking to hang out and I would turn them down since I wasn't single and I was being respectful. After the failed engagement and my most intense heartbreak to date I just said fuck it and detached all emotions from females for a few years.
At this point, looking back I was an asshole. I won't go into detail but they were essentially seen as for me to have my fun and nothing else. Not saying I forced anybody to do anything cause I was an asshole and not a monster, but if they weren't on my program I simply would not speak to them anymore.
Something a bit interesting happened. I noticed after nearly healing from my heartbreak that there were females still consistently trying to hang out when I treated them badly. When I say treat badly I mean I literally would make it known I only wanted one thing, but they kept coming back.
So, then I thought about when I was good. A few of these females said I was a bit corny, lame but a good guy all the same and looked at me like a "brother" or something. After I changed my entire demeanor from the clothes I was wearing, people I hung out with and started drinking/smoking more those same females all of a sudden were more attracted to me. Except one thing, it wasnt me. I was just hurt and frustrated and in a "I don't give a fuck" type attitude.
So, fast forward and I decide to date again. Long story short, the girl turned up pregnant, we broke up due to her wanting to, and after months of slander and her dodging paternity I found out through the state the baby wasn't mine.
Meanwhile, I'm speaking to now my most recent ex about the situation. She kept saying how I was a good person and didn't understand why I was treated such a way, etc and she expressed how she wanted to be with me.
I was reluctant at first because I was still a bit hurt over the past relationship and had to heal myself and plus I stopped liking relationships since my failed engagement years prior. However, I felt like giving her a legitimate chance.
Everything was going well and I treated her nearly as well as my ex fiancee (I say nearly cause I'm a different person now and was putting myself first but still prioritizing her as well) and everything was going well for the first few months. Then, out the blue she says she's bored of the relationship.
So, I try to spice things up by going on more dates, face-timing more, trying to do different things we hadn't done before but she still wasn't pleased. She broke up with me after a long rant of her saying she's not happy with me and I don't know how to be a boyfriend and it felt like we were just friends. I found this a bit odd cause I didn't have sex with my "friends" for over an hour at a time, take them on dates, face time them consistently, write songs/poems to them, etc. To this day, I'm a bit puzzled.
So, I thought it would be beneficial for me to go back and see what my exes are doing and who they ended up with and all that.
I'm dead serious when I say this but only one of them is happily married. The others are single mothers. My ex fiancee in particular is a single mother and the baby daddy is a felon that, at the time I looked into mutual contacts last year, hadn't had a job in multiple years. So, she is taking care of her daughter herself.
So, the point of this topic is basically acknowledging that I don't want to change who I am to be with somebody long term.
I don't mind going out but I don't see a reason to go out every single weekend as I'm a homebody. I'm the type that after I'm with your for awhile I want to make you feel special. So, I'm not entertaining other females mainly because that takes a lot of energy that I don't really care for. I'm not argumentative and will walk away if you raise your voice. This isn't because I'm afraid of confrontation or anything. This is so we don't say anything out of anger and frustration that we got to apologize for after the fact, and depending on what is said it could make the situation worse so I avoid it.
This post is already too long, but I hope the few people that read this understand what I'm saying. I was raised by my grandparents and they were happily married. I know they had problems but they rarely expressed it in front of me, and I never saw them flat out disrespect each other. That's something I always wanted, but it feels like I'm just not built for today's relationships.
It also is a bit discouraging that I'm super attracted to dark skin women, but they never look my way. Majority of my exes were light skinned and while I was attracted to them it was never a fantasy for me to be with a light skin for life no offense.
I also forgot to note that whenever a female called or texted me in my last relationship (I would legit forget who these females are since I hadn't spoke to them in awhile) my ex would automatically think I was cheating but as long as this behavior was going on against my will she didn't say she was bored or anything. When the texts/calls slowed down like crazy that's when she said I was boring and what not.
I don't want to be in a relationship juggling different females just so who I'm with can feel like she got some kinda prize cause other women want me. I'm good. But that's lame by today's standards and I've seen and heard countless dating coaches say you got to "game" your girl even after shes your wife. I look at "game" as mind games or just flat out manipulation. I don't have time for it and it does nothing for me. If I have to do all that just to keep you then you can leave. I'm good.
Anyone else feel the same way?
TL;DR: I feel like in order to make a long term relationship last I have to change myself at the core which is something I don't want to do.
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2021.11.29 14:50 WoahABanD New to stocks, what's out there

Hi, I'm looking into some shroom stocks and would like to know what's out there.
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2021.11.29 14:50 thadcastled Looking for members for a Hermitcraft-like SMP. Last chance to join at the beginning! (16+) EU-friendly

Hello, some friends and I have a Hermitcraft inspired server. We already have around 15 players, and since it isn't our job to play Minecraft, I'd like some more people to join and be apart of the community.

We will have a Shopping District, server-wide events, custom datapacks, and plugins aimed at improving quality-of-life. We have many of the datapacks the Hermits use and other neat little things like inventory sorting, LogUnstripper, and HotbarRefill.
We are looking for mature, chill people to join us (16+). We do not tolerate bullying, harassment, cheating and/or griefing.
Our server is rented though a top hosting company and is up 24/7. It is hosted from Quebec and is EU friendly.
We will be creating a new world when 1.18 drops on November 30th.
If this sounds like something you would enjoy, add me on Discord: thadcastled#9186
submitted by thadcastled to MinecraftBuddies [link] [comments]


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2021.11.29 14:50 unnamed887 For years, a supermarket asked its staff to push a button 'if African customer comes'. Now it's apologising

For years, a supermarket asked its staff to push a button 'if African customer comes'. Now it's apologising submitted by unnamed887 to Aotearoa_Anarchism [link] [comments]


2021.11.29 14:50 Bonus1Fact Naomi Wolf: Dr. Fauci Should Be Scared - There Will Be Investigations ¦ TGP Rumble

Naomi Wolf: Dr. Fauci Should Be Scared - There Will Be Investigations ¦ TGP Rumble submitted by Bonus1Fact to NewsShorts [link] [comments]


2021.11.29 14:50 pinkllemonaid HALO??? MORE LIKE GAYLO!!!!!!

someone tbagged me in halo infinite and i broke my desk now im mad! halo is stupid and gay!!!!!
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2021.11.29 14:50 EarthWarping [MLB Nerds] After losing out on Scherzer, the Dodgers will pivot to Frankie Montas. Montas pitched 187.0 innings last season to a 3.37 ERA, 3.79 SIERA, and 4.1 fWAR.

[MLB Nerds] After losing out on Scherzer, the Dodgers will pivot to Frankie Montas. Montas pitched 187.0 innings last season to a 3.37 ERA, 3.79 SIERA, and 4.1 fWAR. submitted by EarthWarping to baseball [link] [comments]


2021.11.29 14:50 zakkwaldo This sub has been on some weird vibes recently

This sub has been on some weird vibes recently submitted by zakkwaldo to borderlands3 [link] [comments]


2021.11.29 14:50 vitahunter [NA-EU] [H] Digital game codes PS4/PS5/PSVR/Switch/Xbox [W] Paypal

All the games I am selling are digital codes.
Xbox :

PS4/PS5/PSVR (codes are NA - US region unless specified otherwise) :
Nintendo Switch (codes are NA - US region unless specified otherwise) :
Want :
submitted by vitahunter to GameSale [link] [comments]


2021.11.29 14:50 BLUYX Quick Club Discussion

Is there a clan above 400'000 trophies, with active members and free space for new players? Trophy requirement about 15'000? Cause I'm really searching for one rn!
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2021.11.29 14:50 surfANDmusic Is this legit? Or is the only scam that only training is $20/hr?

Is this legit? Or is the only scam that only training is $20/hr? submitted by surfANDmusic to Scams [link] [comments]


2021.11.29 14:50 Mimoosh99 Hye Craft

Fresh Minecraft server semi-vanilla SMP
Ip is craft.HYE.gg
You can create your own for free as well and it is very fast. Check out the discord for the survival server and host.
https://discord.gg/xWAsBnJYPU
submitted by Mimoosh99 to MCVanillaServers [link] [comments]


2021.11.29 14:50 Devajeetd Dunno if this was posted here before...but this is the very first security code in the Guardians of the Galaxy game

Dunno if this was posted here before...but this is the very first security code in the Guardians of the Galaxy game submitted by Devajeetd to Deusex [link] [comments]


2021.11.29 14:50 Affectionate-Try-541 Get Paid To Take Photos, Start Selling Your Photos Today

Get Paid To Take Photos, Start Selling Your Photos Today submitted by Affectionate-Try-541 to astrophotography [link] [comments]


2021.11.29 14:50 oxycontin160mg Feebas

Any chance that someone of you guys have a feebas or a feebas egg laying around cant find the right tile and been trying dor hours
TIA
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2021.11.29 14:50 raydenbrough A true friwnd be like:

A true friwnd be like: submitted by raydenbrough to wholesomememes [link] [comments]


2021.11.29 14:50 CesarV With so many reports of animal attacks, let's pool our knowledge together to help each other stay safe out there!

I am prayin 4 all u out thar.
Plz post attack details and how you survived. All terrain descriptions must contain the word "deep."
I will go first:
Location: Sweden
Terrain: Deep savanna
Animal: Kangaroo wielding a black mamba in one hand and communism in the other
Temps: -69C
How I survived: I never wouldn't have made it if I had not just finished forging my stone katana and ice wakizashi. I was also wearing three layers of DCF padded armor, which is so light, I can still wear it as a kensai.
He looked at me. I looked at him. Thus it began. He was fast, I will give him that, but little did he know that I had cast improved invisibility as a readied action when I heard rustlin' in the bushes.
"So that's how you do battle? As a cowardly ninja, hidden in the shadows!" He hollered in my general vicinity.
Fool! I thought. He takes me for a mere ninja, and does not recognize my skill as a wizard. It mattered not, for soon I plunged both my blades up to the hilt into his back. He never saw it coming.
"You may have bested me, but... you still must face Grandpa...!" And he unleashed the slithering terror upon me.
"Grandpa?" Said I, to the serpent. "This is your Christian name?" I quipped as I drew my blades from my foe, covered in gleaming, blue/green blood.
The beast hissed, then... struck! But I knew exactly what to do...
Gently I dodged the bite, and even more gentle I stroked Grandpa's scales.
"Don't stop." Grandpa hissed, sexually, and assumed his true form. I knew it all along: sticks as snakes spell, but modified--hunk as snake!
Brad Pitt stood there, naked as the day he was born. We ran our fingers through our hair. We kissed, French style, as the sun set behind us.
"Grandpa is my secret wizard nick name. You can call me Brad Pitt."
We were wed the next day, in secret wizard fashion. But alas, Angelina (a talented witch in her own right) divined our secret. Some say this is what caused their divorce.
But I learned an important lesson that fateful day, upon the beautiful, rolling deep savanna of Sweden:
Ye wanderer have unto thee two blades--hark!--it is only one blade; itself, existing, nevermore.
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2021.11.29 14:50 HRBTERPS First Time Grower I Have An Auto On 18/6 And She’s Just Now 4 Days Into Flower Should I Change The Light Schedule Since She’s In Flower Or Do I Keep it on 18/6

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2021.11.29 14:50 Jon8RFC What kind of doctor moonlights as a gigolo?

A hormone specialist.
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2021.11.29 14:50 WedgieWriter69 Jennifer Westhoven HLN

Jennifer Westhoven HLN submitted by WedgieWriter69 to CurvyNewsWomen [link] [comments]


2021.11.29 14:50 YeetoDeletoDorito How to make it so my workshop character can change into another person

I’m making multiple Rivals characters, and some of them have movesets where they switch between weapons or switch between people, like Pokémon Trainer from smash bros. However, I don’t know really how to do that, so I need some help. Sorry if this seems vague.
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2021.11.29 14:50 speaking_facts06 Can Tadap be the next Aashiqui 2 ?

I'm not talking about Box Office collection wise but the craze wise. A2 was a sleeper hit and made Aditya Roy Kapoor and Shraddha Kapoor overnight stars. I remember how crazy my classmates used to be about Aditya and it's music was also popular. Like A2 , Tadap is also an intense and passionate love story . It's music is also good especially Tumse bhi Zyada. I feel like magic of Pritam - Arijit always works. What I feel can work for Tadap is Milan Luthria direction, he has given good movies like TDP , OUTIM . And the twist in the plot in climax ( iykyk) and since it's the remake of hit telugu film so it can work just like kabir Singh, simba .
PS - Personally, I'm looking forward to it bcoz I really liked the original one. This is one is nowhere close to rx100 but still will looking for it. I'm not expecting too much but still it can be a surprise package .No one thought of Adi & Shraddha as serious actors before A2 but it changed the game for them . Same we all think of Tara , Ahan . It can place them miles ahead of their rivals if this succeeds . This post is inspired such similar post from r\bollywood.
Thoughts ??
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2021.11.29 14:50 Jonathan-Todd Defense idea to enrich analysis against web traffic to find beacons: MITM the user input activity?

Trying to pick out the signal from the noise in endpoint and over-the-wire threat hunting / detection is of course a primary challenge, right behind the challenge of making sure our endpoint sensors aren't subverted or evaded.
Something just occurred to me that might be an interesting approach to both problems when it comes to finding that signal in the noise of web traffic. Sure, beacons can use DNS and a few other tunneling methods to get out, but since we have hundreds or thousands of unpredictable users making web requests, that's an excellent exfiltration vector with plenty of natural noise to hide a malicious signal.
What corresponding event usually goes along with that HTTPS traffic though? User input. If we logged the timestamps of user keyboard and mouse activity and correlated that to the timestamps of web requests to filter out any connections initiated within moments of user activity (or something like that), we should be left with APIs to trustworthy domains which we can easily filter and a few outliers which should include beacon activity.
But that does leave us potentially with the problem of trusting our endpoint sensors. What's to stop the attacker's beacon from spoofing user input events along-side their beaconing traffic? Depending on how many customers have that level of concern, a vendor might find there could be a market for a physical USB plug-and-play interceptor device to MITM the keyboard and mouse connections to offer along side their EDR product. These shouldn't be very expensice to manufacture since there's probably already existing programmable hardware for it and could guarantee a direct data feed into the network for highly reliable user-input logs. To avoid privacy concerns the input itself could be left out, just the event timestamps would be enough.
Of course most orgs could probably skip the fancy endpoint dongles in favor of standard software sensors.
Thoughts? Counters? Considerations?
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2021.11.29 14:50 robbi329 Feeling euphoric today 🥰👄 Nice comments are always welcomed (38yo ~ MTF ~1 year HRT)

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